When you hear the word “dependency,” what does it conjure up for you? Feelings of resistance? Discomfort? Maybe a squirmy feeling? Or something more positive? Does it feel good for you to be needed? 

When we first emerge into the world as infants, we are 100% dependent on our caregiver(s) for all our physical, emotional, psychological, spiritual, and relational needs. Our parents have been responsible for every one of our needs, day in and day out, for years. It is a biological imperative to attach to our caregiver (attachment figure), and it’s completely instinctual—it’s how a baby survives. Being someone’s attachment figure is incredibly demanding.

Attachment science empirically speaks to the similarity between how a child attaches to a parent and how an adult attaches to their spouse, meaning our attachment figure changes from our parent to our significant other. However, your partner is not your caregiver… Contingent on your attachment style (anxious, avoidant, secure), it can become triggering to depend on or depend on someone else.

Join Jayson and Ellen to better understand healthy and unhealthy dependency, normalize it, and even use our needs and dependence to deepen connection. 

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What lessons can families learn from businesses? Have you ever thought of formalizing your values as a family and creating a vision statement?

Ellen and I had the privilege to chat with Chris and Melissa Smith, founders of Family Brand, and loving parents to five kids. We discuss what it’s like to have (and come from) an unusually large family, their near-divorce experience, and how they are now happier and stronger than ever before. They talk about why they founded Family Brand, and highlight the importance of working on oneself first and, and being very intentional with your commitment to your partner and parenting to co-create a brand unique to your family unit and why/how that’s helpful.

Do you find yourself in a relationship with someone who isn’t meeting you halfway?

Are you curious to learn why your partner refuses to do their part of the work in the relationship?

According to behavioral psychology, human beings are hedonistic. We prefer pleasure over pain, good over evil, comfortable over uncomfortable—even though  it is through discomfort that we grow. If you listen to the podcast, I consider you a growth/developmental-oriented person. If a non-growth/developmental-oriented person stays in a relationship with you long enough, they inevitably will bump up against discomfort and will do one of three things: run, check out, or sabotage.

Tune in to this short episode to learn more about avoidance tactics, the number one reason your partner resists change, and the role shame plays in this dynamic.

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Have you ever wondered if there was something you could do quickly when you were triggered and it just made everything better? 

This week we’re joined by Spiritual Coach Mamoon Yusaf who gives us the elevator speech description of the Qu’ran and it’s deeper meaning). He shares his experience growing up in a posh British grammar school as a young Pakistani boy, becoming a Spiritual Coach, and awakening as a way of owning his feelings, the reactions that changed his life and his relationships for the better. But most importantly he shares a quick method to work through triggers.

Are you a "dad to be," or are you already on the field but want to up your parenting game and become the kind of father and husband you always wanted to be (i.e., sincerely present and very engaged)?

Buckle up for a candid, special, extra-long episode geared explicitly for dads with advice on pre-birth, birth (how to support the process and show up), and post-birth (notes on sleep, sex, healthy brain development, post-partum, technological considerations, carrying your child) and more.

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