Info

Relationship School Podcast

Learn street level, practical tools to have better relationships from a real dude who is a solid husband and father. Jayson Gaddis, founder of The Relationship School, interviews couples, experts, neuroscientists, therapists, coaches, and everyday people to help you have the best relationships possible. Watch your long-term partnerships, family relationships, friendships, and work relationships get better. Jayson offers a fun action step at the end of each episode. Let's do this people! Let's learn how to love bigger! The world needs it.
RSS Feed Subscribe in Apple Podcasts
Relationship School Podcast
2024
October
September
August
July
June
May
April
March
February
January


2023
December
November
October
September
August
July
June
May
April
March
February
January


2022
December
November
October
September
August
July
June
May
April
March
February
January


2021
December
November
October
September
August
July
June
May
April
March
February
January


2020
December
November
October
September
August
July
June
May
April
March
February
January


2019
December
November
October
September
August
July
June
May
April
March
January


2018
December
November
October
September
August
July
June
May
April
March
February
January


2017
December
November
October
September
August
July
June
May
April
March
February
January


2016
December
November
October
September
August
July
June
May
April
March
February
January


2015
December
November
October
September
August
July
May


All Episodes
Archives
Now displaying: 2024
Oct 1, 2024

In this coaching session, Jayson works with Becca, a woman navigating a relationship with a partner who doesn’t acknowledge her feelings. How should you deal with a partner who isn’t open to seeking relationship help? What should you do if your partner struggles to handle your emotions? If you're in a relationship with someone who doesn’t recognize your feelings, you won’t want to miss this powerful session.

Timestamps:

  • 6:11 - When a partner isn't on board to get help
  • 13:00 - When a partner won't recognize your feelings
  • 16:50 - Don't settle for not being met

Links:

Sep 24, 2024

In this live coaching session, Jayson coaches Sharon, a woman struggling with self-worth and feelings of not being enough. How can you stop repeating untrue stories to yourself and create new associations? What’s the best way to start focusing on the ways you are enough? What are you gaining by staying in negative patterns? If you’re struggling with self-worth or feeling like you’re not enough, you won’t want to miss this inspiring coaching session.

Timestamps:

  • 6:00 - Struggling with shame
  • 10:00 - The pattern of feeling not enough
  • 15:24 - Recognizing the areas where you are enough
  • 20:28 - Creating new associations

Links:

Sep 17, 2024

In this live coaching session, Jayson coaches Susan, a woman who has identified her spending patterns as problematic. How do you know when a behavior crosses over into an addiction? How does a lack of meaning contribute to addiction? What role can healthy relationships play in helping someone escape from addiction? If you or someone you know is struggling with addiction, you won’t want to miss this inspiring coaching session.

Timestamps:

  • 4:29 - Spending addiction
  • 11:51 - How do we define addiction?
  • 14:37 - The root cause of addiction
  • 17:35 - The role of meaning
  • 22:48 - Religion

Links:

Sep 10, 2024

In this live coaching session, Jayson coaches Derek, an anxious man struggling with an avoidant partner. How should couples balance the need for space with the need for connection? How can you tell if your relationship concerns stem from care or fear? How do you know if couples therapy is working? Don’t miss this powerful coaching session!

Timestamps:

  • 6:09 - How to set boundaries while maintaining a relationship
  • 9:09 - Balancing the need for space and connection
  • 15:27 - Is your therapy working?
  • 21:16 - Are you working from fear or care?
  • 24:12 - Being honest with your partner

Links:

Aug 27, 2024

In this episode, Jayson introduces three powerful trainings designed to transform your life and relationships. 
First, explore the Communication Breakthrough Experience, where hands-on demos and live coaching sessions help you overcome communication barriers and deepen your emotional connections. 
Next, learn about Relationship Coach Training, a program that empowers you to turn your passion for personal growth and relationships into a fulfilling career, making a meaningful impact on others. 
Finally, discover Couples Coach Training, a comprehensive 9-month journey that combines cutting-edge science and experiential therapies to equip you with the skills and confidence to coach couples effectively. Whether you're seeking personal growth, a new career, or the tools to help others, these trainings offer the potential for profound change. Don't miss this opportunity to take your life to the next level!

Timestamps:
  • 2:43 - Communication Breakthrough Experience
  • 5:27 - Relationship Coach Training
  • 7:16 - Couples Coach Training

Links:

Jul 30, 2024

Do you wish you and your partner still communicated like you did when you first fell in love? In this episode, Jayson delves into the science of infatuation—why we experience it and why it fades. Can you rekindle the magic of the early days of your relationship, or is there something even better ahead? Tune in to discover how to earn your second honeymoon stage.

Timestamps:

  • 2:48 - Infatuation
  • 6:16 - Falling out of love or working toward relational maturity?
  • 9:49 - Learning how to communicate
  • 13:48 - Earning your second honeymoon stage

Links:

Jul 9, 2024

Jayson and Ellen delve into the complex relationship between teens, screens, and mental health. Is it okay to use screens to help kids calm down? Are teens becoming more anxious? At what age should children have their own cell phones? What societal changes are needed to protect the mental health and well-being of children and teens? How can you effectively implement boundaries at home? Tune in to find the answers to these and many more questions.

Timestamps:

  • 2:35 - Why screen time matters
  • 5:50 - The Anxious Generation
  • 9:00 - Using screens to help kids calm down
  • 17:00 - The problem with content
  • 21:00 - The problem with texting
  • 23:30 - Setting boundaries
  • 30:30 - Haidt's four recommendations
  • 33:30 - Jayson and Ellen's recommendations
  • 43:00 - Action steps

Links:

Jul 2, 2024
In this episode, psychotherapist Terri Cole shares some creative (and funny) strategies for handling problematic family relationships.
 
Timestamps:
  • Why Interacting With Family Can Be So Difficult [1:30]
  • Terri Cole’s Family Experience [3:30]
  • The Importance Of Boundaries and Language With Family [7:30]
  • Examples Of Managing Family Dysfunction Successfully [9:30]
  • Strategies For Avoiding Unwanted Conversations With Family [14:30]
  • Is It Okay To Just Walk Away From Shitty Family Conversations? [23:00]
  • Taking A Break From Family And Avoiding Family Holidays Altogether [25:00]
  • When Mom And Partner Are Competing For Attention [29:00]

Links:

Jun 25, 2024

Jayson answers listener questions: How should you deal with trauma responses in intimate situations? Should your partner have access to your phone? What should you do if your partner isn’t interested in personal growth? What is the right way to apologize? Is it possible to make a relationship work with an emotionless partner? Find the answers to these questions and more on this episode of The Relationship School Podcast.

Timestamps:

  • 2:19 - Trauma responses in intimate situations
  • 5:55 - Dealing with a condescending partner
  • 7:45 - Should your partner have access to your phone?
  • 11:58 - Partner isn't interested in personal growth
  • 14:32 - Apologizing
  • 16:13 - Emotionless partnerships
  • 18:45 - Intentions and apologies

Links:

Jun 18, 2024

Jayson and Ellen offer advice for anxious new dads. Why do many new dads struggle to enjoy parenting? What happens when men become aware of their relational needs for the first time, and how should they approach meeting those needs? Should new dads consider therapy? What kind of support should new dads seek from their male friends? What about sex? If you're a new parent or know new parents, you won't want to miss this.

Timestamps:

  • 1:23 - When men struggle to enjoy parenting
  • 14:57 - Men becoming conscious of their relational needs
  • 24:42 - Support from other men
  • 29:33 - Avoidant men
  • 33:52 - Sex

Links:

Jun 11, 2024

Jayson talks with Dr. Peter Levine about the subject of trauma. Peter shares the harrowing story of what happened when his father testified against the mafia and explains why he decided to get vulnerable about his trauma in his latest book, An Autobiography of Trauma: A Healing Journey. Jayson and Peter discuss how the perception of trauma has changed recently, the danger of retraumatizing people, the process of healing trauma, and why you should be careful about who you choose to share your trauma with. Don’t miss this powerful episode.

Timestamps:

  • 4:05 - Why Peter decided to get vulnerable
  • 11:39 - Is it important to tell your story?
  • 18:15 - Testifying against the mafia
  • 26:22 - Healing from trauma by sharing
  • 34:29 - Relationships and trauma
  • 40:46 - Trauma and association
  • 50:07 - Retraumatizing people
  • 59:21 - Action step

Links:

Jun 4, 2024

What’s the #1 mistake people make after getting their feelings hurt? Jayson discusses how to handle hurt feelings, his experience with shutting down after experiencing hurt feelings, and how to work through hurt feelings. Tune in to find out how you can turn hurt feelings into an opportunity to grow into a more resilient, self-respecting, and confident person.

Timestamps:

  • 3:09 - The mistake people make when their feelings get hurt
  • 6:18 - Jayson's experience with hurt feelings
  • 10:18 - Feel your feelings
  • 14:47 - Takeaway

Links:

May 28, 2024

Ellen Boeder interviews Johannah Reimer to find out how women can help teen girls. They discuss the unique problems that teen girls face today, the evolutionary mismatch between the environments we evolved in and modern life, the importance of doing hard things and Johannah’s Girls Group Facilitator Training, “Pathways to Womanhood”which is about guiding and supporting girls on their journey to womanhood.

Johannah is a soulcentric educator, ceremonialist, teen mentor, and an artist of many trades. Trained as a Waldorf teacher, Johannah has been working with children of all ages for over 20 years and holds a particular passion for tweens/teens striving to meet their developmental needs for mentorship and initiation in a culture that has forgotten how to do so. An apprentice of visionaries: Sage Hamilton and Melissa Michaels of SOMA Source, Johannah has worked for many years as a Waldorf teacher under the guidance of her elder Sage, and as an embodied leader for international youth in movement based Rites of Passage with Golden Bridge & Golden Girls Global.

Timestamps:

  • 5:33 - Johannah's path to becoming an educator
  • 13:19 - Why create girls' groups
  • 26:56 - Evolutionary mismatch
  • 30:20 - The value of doing hard things
  • 34:22 - Becoming an entrepreneur
  • 37:55 - What will people take from the training?
  • 43:26 - Advice for teenage girls

Links:

May 21, 2024

Jayson opens up about his recent prostate cancer diagnosis. He talks about the causes of cancer, letting people’s care in and his recommendations for how men should monitor their health as they age. This episode is a PSA for men over 40, if you haven’t been screened for cancer, now is the time.

Timestamps:

  • 2:16 - Jayson's experience
  • 6:34 - Causes of cancer
  • 9:01 - Letting people's care in
  • 12:15 - Recommendations for men over 40

Links:

May 14, 2024

IN THIS EPISODE, You will learn:

  • To see your partner as a sacred mirror and sanctuary for the growing your greatest actualized self
  • The true characteristics of a long-term partnership
  • How your partnership is the optimal container for complete transformation of yourself into the highest possible version imaginable
  • How to fall in love and why this is more important than being married
  • How to take radical responsibility for being loved in every moment of your life
  • How to actually get your needs/wants met in a partnership
  • How to know if conflict in your relationship is driving you toward or away from more magnificence

There’s a ton in this episode so dive in and go slow.

And, Here’s a great question from Annie to ask yourself if you are trying to decide to stay or leave:

Is the person I’m being called to become by what my partner’s asking me to become (if you take on the growth-development framework), will you become a more extraordinary version of yourself? If who they are asking you to become is a constricted, small, tight version of you, then this is probably not the person you want to be with.

However, if you identify as the smaller version of you, then, you are going to hear your partner’s feedback as criticism and blame and might make them wrong in the process. So, pay attention to these finer points.

Timestamps:

  • 1:47 - What are we getting into when we say yes to long-term relationships?
  • 6:04 - Becoming the best version of yourself
  • 9:49 - Annie's story
  • 16:48 - Taking responsibility when we don't feel loved
  • 21:35 - Getting out of your victimhood
  • 30:34 - When to leave

Links:

May 7, 2024

Most of us have no idea how damaging relational stress can be. In this episode, legendary medical doctor and psycho-physio-spiritual trailblazer Dr. Gabor Maté brings some very grounded, practical examples of how relationship stress can impact our lives. The result of stress can be seen throughout the web of our life and it’s up to us to learn how to relate and attach well to our fellow humans. I love how this man turns such complicated topics into common sense. If you want a deeper cut about your marriage, children, or any stressful relationship, this episode is a must listen.

SHOWNOTES

  • What happens when Gabor’s wife forgets to pick him up at the airport. [8:30]
  • How our partners are perfectly suited to help us grow. [10:35]
  • What happened in Gabor’s childhood that makes his wife a perfect match for him now. [13:00]
  • The long-term cost of not dealing with stress. [15:00]
  • How parents can be compromised by raising their children. [17:30]
  • The link between our relationship health and our physical and mental health. [19:30]
  • What’s the best way to deal with our own relational and attachment issues? [29:00]
  • Why relational healing modalities are so effective. [30:00]
  • What we can learn from pygmy cultures about parenting and relationships. [32:30]
  • How relationship can most effectively be taught to children. [34:00]
  • The effect of Facebook and Internet on kids. [38:00]

Links:

Apr 30, 2024

Are you attending couples therapy but feeling like you're not making progress? Jayson and Ellen delve into why couples often find themselves spinning their wheels and offer insights on how to propel your relationship forward if you're feeling stuck. They also tackle the issue of spiritual bypassing, emphasizing that true letting go is a gradual process.

Timestamps:

  • 2:01 - Couples not making progress
  • 7:36 - Doing the work
  • 22:28 - Overly spiritual couples

Links:

Apr 23, 2024

Irka and Eugene join Jayson to talk non-monogamy. Is monogamy inherently restrictive? Do people in polyamorous relationships have boundaries? Is non-hierarchical polyamory possible? What role does sexual exploration play in a polyamorous relationship? Is non-monogamy for you? Whether you’re monogamous or not, you’ll find plenty of wisdom in this insightful conversation.

Timestamps:

  • 8:45 - Definitions and terms
  • 11:40 - Boundaries
  • 19:52 - Thirds
  • 34:09 - Is monogamy inherently restrictive?
  • 37:39 - Sexual exploration
  • 42:27 - Is non-monogamy for you?
  • 51:03 - Communication
  • 53:51 - Advice for high school kids
  • 57:45 - Links
  • 59:15 - Action step

Links:

Apr 16, 2024

In this podcast, I interview Satyen and Suzanne, both long-time students of David Deida. These two are super honest, loving individuals, and wow have they been through a lot! There share some very vulnerable details about how they navigated religion, affairs, and fighting. They give you concrete practical tools you can try right now with your partner. These guys live it!

SHOWNOTES

  • How did Satyen and Suzanne start caring about relationships? [4:27]
  • Why did Satyen resist marriage? [7:00]
  • What ingredient was the “it” factor for Suzanne’s attraction to Satyen? [7:44]
  • What role did religion play in their relationship? [10:42]
  • How did fighting about food bring them closer? [12:15]
  • What impact did David Deida have on their connection? [14:28]
  • How did they create a new template for their relationship? [16:06]
  • The most challenging period of their relationship [18:02]
  • One really important practice to heal from infidelity [20:15]
  • Satyen and Suzanne demonstrate a powerful tool to express emotional pain to your partner [26:30]
  • The often-missed key to understanding your partner [32:43]
  • What is PCP and ISE and how do they create connection and turn-on? [34:50]

Links:

 

Satyen and Suzanne are the authorities on relationship – passionately intwined for twenty-seven years and sought after by people over the the world for their powerful and cutting edge trainings. With over two decades of study, teaching and facilitation in this area, they have taught tens of thousands of singles and couples the art of creating passionate, juicy intimacy that lasts a lifetime.

A living demonstration of a couple who are continually re-igniting their spark, passion and love, Satyen and Suzanne practically distill what for many can be a confusing, frustrating and even painful topic down to its very workable, irresistible essence. Whether on radio, tv or in auditoriums of thousands, their style is provocative, inspiring, and above all, full of practical wisdom. They have a unique gift for hearing what lies beneath your questions, and giving you answers that convey deep truths with incredible heart. Never shy of controversy, they are willing to take conventional wisdom to task where it falls short in order to help you learn and live the most effective relationship skills.

Satyen and Suzanne are committed to, and superlatively skilled at, saying the things that no one else says, going places that no one else goes — so that you can have the hot, deep, loving, passionate relationship that you deserve…starting now!

http://acceleratedevolutionacademy.com

Apr 9, 2024

Jayson shares his thoughts on the controversy surrounding popular podcaster Andrew Huberman. What can we learn about ourselves and our relationships from the online reaction to the recent revelations about Andrew Huberman? What are you projecting onto the authority figures in your life? Are you putting people in your life on a pedestal, and how will you react when they inevitably fail you?

Timestamps:

  • 2:17 - What can we learn from the Andrew Huberman situation?
  • 5:24 - Pedestal to pit
  • 13:55 - Are you projecting on to authority figures?

Links:

Apr 2, 2024

Relationship pain has a very clear purpose. If you are hip to it, you’ll thrive in relationships. If you are uneducated here, you’ll run away and play the victim. Direct and to the point, I suggest a very important daily practice for you to strengthen your mindset about long-term partnership. Pain hurts indeed. And, what if pain was your ally in disguise?

 

Relationship Pain Daily Practice

I have two choices with my relationship pain:

1. Use it to make me weaker by whining, complaining, and blaming others (or myself).
2. Use it to make me stronger by seeing it as my ally to master the lesson it’s bringing me.

It’s 100% of the time up to me to choose.


Timestamps:

  • 3:15 - Two choices when it comes to relationship pain
  • 9:32 - The first thing to NOT do when in relationship pain
  • 13:40 - The good news about pain and stress
  • 19:40 - The link between your emotional pain and your numbing habits
  • 24:37 - Action step

Links:

Mar 26, 2024

Are you simply defaulting to monogamy?

Have you ever genuinely asked yourself, "Would a different sexual model work better for me?"

Dan Savage, an author, sex-advice columnist, podcaster, and public speaker, suggests that we should all regularly pose these questions to ourselves. Dan and his husband have chosen what they call a "monogamish" relationship. They've acknowledged that it's impossible to fulfill all of your partner's needs, and that's a message from which we can all learn.

While we typically focus on monogamous long-term relationships, in this episode, we'll explore how various types of relationships can be successful. Tune in and prepare for some introspection into your own sexual expression.

Timestamps:

  • 5:00 - What does monogamish mean?
  • 11:27 - Eroticism in a long-term relationship
  • 17:24 - Bringing in a third
  • 23:37 - Monogamy as the default setting
  • 31:00 - Changing broken marraige norms
  • 33:50 - Dan's relationship journey
  • 46:49 - Allowing for erotic autonomy
  • 53:57 - Dan's advice for young people
  • 59:00 - Action step

Links:

Mar 19, 2024

Jayson and Ellen discuss conflict, communication, and problem-solving versus understanding. What's the issue with being a conflict-avoidant couple? When is it appropriate to problem-solve and offer advice to a long-term partner? Can excessive understanding become problematic? Tune in to hear Ellen and Jayson offer a few simple strategies that you can use to resolve your communication issues.

Timestamps:

  • 1:51 - Avoiding Conflict
  • 11:21 - Solving communication problems
  • 17:04 - Problem solving vs understanding
  • 20:28 - The conflict-repair cycle
  • 22:31 - Taking action vs understanding

Links:

Mar 12, 2024

Jayson coaches the couple, Anya and Bodhi. The last time this couple appeared on the podcast was in episode #364 when they were in the midst of deciding whether to stay together or break up. Since their last appearance, they have grown into a strong and stable couple. In this episode, they discuss the turning point in their relationship that led to them staying together. They also work through current tensions in their relationship related to conflicting schedules and navigating a small living space. You won’t want to miss this insightful conversation.

Timestamps:

  • 5:17 - Anya & Bodhi's turning point
  • 13:23 - Individual growth
  • 20:00 - Getting to the root of relationship tension
  • 33:34 - Feeling trapped by a lack of connectedness
  • 39:05 - Spontaneity vs. responsibility
  • 43:00 - Different schedules
  • 47:00 - Helping your partner feel less judged
  • 1:00:30 - Being true to yourself vs. being considerate
  • 1:08:59 - Action step

Links:

Mar 5, 2024

Jayson is joined by his son Lucian for a conversation about the unique challenges of being a teenager in high school. What are the challenges of being from a relationally focused family? What kinds of stereotypes do teens face? Why do so many parents over-parent their kids? You won’t want to miss this candid father-son conversation.

Timestamps:

  • 3:52 - Boys in high school
  • 5:28 - Social media apps
  • 6:19 - Waldorf vs. public high school
  • 9:21 - The relational family experiance
  • 16:41 - Challenges high school kids face
  • 20:25 - Over-parenting
  • 23:41 - How to get teenagers involved

Links:

1 2 Next »