Nicole asks, “I found your interview with (Dan) Savage to be highly enlightening and incredibly emotional. As a married straight woman in a monogamous relationship with children, I felt very triggered by the concept of ‘enough’. Am I enough? I am constantly struggling to feel like I am enough of anything, and I feel like your podcast has started to help me feel settled into an idea that monogamy and marriage can provide enough for both partners, if it is viewed as a journey and a goal. This interview ripped open some pretty deep and vulnerable wounds surrounding being enough.”
Erica wonders, “I’ve been married to my husband for nine years and together for fourteen. Even in the beginning of our relationship the sex wasn’t as frequent as I’d have liked, so I had to. Now we’re married and I feel like the sissue is in the different sex drives continues to bother me. I just need to need more sex than he does. He knows that I wish he’d initiate sex more, and we’ve gone to many years of therapy. I fear this will never get better. Is it foolish to think my husband could change? Is it possible for men to become more assertive or change how often they need sex? I’m afraid to get divorced as we have a seven year old son, but I think i’m coming to terms with the fact that this issue isn’t going away as I continue to resent not feeling desired.”
Tune in to hear Jayson unpack these poignant questions from fellow listeners.
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Shavani asks, “Most times conflicts drain us of mental energy and time, even with both partners’ willingness to work through it. For me, conflict often takes hours of constant talking, fighting, and finally resolving. This is especially tough when work is involved that requires preparation and clarity. How do we work through conflict in a way that doesn’t impact other parts of our lives that are important for our personal growth and well-being?”
Kim wonders, “Have you ever covered sexual frequency in a marriage? He wants it WAY more because that’s how he thinks of connection, and I don’t want it nearly enough because he won’t open up, let me in, and connect on a deeper emotional level, so there is a constant struggle.”
Lilian is curious: “I have a dear friend that means well but always plays devil’s advocate when I come to her with a painful experience or when I need support. She says it’s because she’s a Libra. Where’s the line of calling your friend out on their B.S., and holding space for them with empathy in moments when they are experiencing pain?”
Join Ellen and Jayson as they unpack listener questions regarding unresolved conflicts, sexual desire differences, and challenging friendships.
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“Any advice to get over a fear of dependency?” Amy wants to know.
“Is it possible for one partner to be dependent, and the other to be independent? Does that change over time? What can I do when I get triggered by his independence?” asks @twopopcorn.
“Therapists always say, ‘You’re responsible for meeting your own needs’...How do you allow yourself to depend on someone and also not expect someone to give you what you need?” Jean is curious about.
Join Jayson and Ellen for this follow-up AMA episode (inspired by Episode 423: Dependent, Independent, Interdependent) where they answer listener questions on dependency.
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Want some help understanding what the opposite sex thinks and feels about being partners, parents, cohabitating, careers, etc.?
Care to learn how to structure leadership equitably with your partner?
Can you identify with stereotypical gender roles—specifically with couples who are also parents?
Curious to learn why some men resist or devalue hands-on parenting?
Join Jayson and Ellen as they unpack how gender roles play into your most intimate relationship, how they relate to our cultural landscape, and how to structure leadership/relate to each other as partners and co-parents.
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